If someone you know has passed away, then you can express your condolences with a sympathy card. Choosing condolence wording to write in your sympathy card can be hard because you want to make sure that you don’t say anything that might upset the bereaved. You also might find it difficult to find the right words to say because you have never lost a loved one before. To help you express your condolences in a letter or card, read these condolence wording tips and examples.
Some of the words that you can use when writing your condolence letters are: Sorry, Sincerely, Comforted, Memory, Strength, Peace, Saddened, Prayers, Thoughts, Pray, Miss, Genuine, Deepest, Condolences, Loss.
Choose four or five of these words and use them in your condolence letter. For example, if you choose the words “Sorry”, “Prayers”, “Saddened”, and “Miss”, then you can write something like “I am so sorry for your loss. I was deeply saddened when I found out that he or she has passed away. I will miss him or her terribly. You and your family will always be in my prayers.”
Make Your Condolence Wording Personal
You should make your condolence letter as personal as possible. You can make your letter personal by saying something positive about the deceased. We also recommend that you include a personal memory or story. Write about a fond memory that reminds you of the deceased or a story that explains a positive attribute about the person. Some examples of personal messages of condolence are:
- “My condolences. I will greatly miss Mary’s smile and her ability to naturally make any situation happy. I remember when I was going through my divorce and how she helped me get through it. She was always there when I needed her, and I hope that I can be there for you now.”
- “I am so sorry for your loss. Your family will always be in my prayers. Your wife was my best friend throughout university. She was always willing to help me with whatever I needed. Whether it was helping me study or giving me advice on relationships, I knew I could count on her. Mary will be missed greatly.”
- “I was very saddened to hear that Mary has passed away. She was such an angel and a blessing from God. Even though our families live in different cities, Mary always made an effort to keep in touch. I appreciated her phone calls and the interest she took in my life. We will miss her terribly and I am glad that I got to know her.”
Proper Condolence Wording Structure
It is helpful to know how to structure a condolence message. The most common way to start a condolence message is to say “I’m sorry for your loss” or “I was very saddened to hear that he or she has passed away”. Next, you will want to say something positive about the deceased such as “He or she was such a nice person” or “He or she was the most hardworking person in our office and no one can replace him or her.” Next, it will make the condolence more personalized if you include a personal memory or story. After that, you should conclude by saying how you will greatly miss the deceased or that he or she will always be in your prayers.
Remember to make your condolence letter as personal as possible. Talk about the positive qualities of the deceased and avoid saying clichés like “It was their time to go.” You should also avoid saying something negative about the feelings about the bereaved such as “You must be feeling sad right now.” Saying “I feel sad” is better than saying “you must feel sad” to someone who is grieving for her loved one.
Updated: May 30, 2012